My Decision Not to have Kids

I am a pretty transparent person. It’s boring to me to make small talk with people. I want to know what your goals and dreams are. Where you want to travel. If money were no object, what would you do? I sometimes find it difficult to talk about the weather or gas prices because I just really don’t care. I would rather talk about things that are important to you or me.

With that being said, someone reached out to my mom recently to ask her if I was planning on having kids. My mom is very aware of where I stand on the matter and she let the person know that having children is not part of my life plan. Maybe no one else has been curious but I don’t mind talking about it so here we go…

I do not want children. As far as I can remember, I’ve never wanted children. I don’t want to offend any mothers out there. It’s just not a desire I’ve ever had. There are a lot of reasons. The first one is that I’m self centered. I like doing my own thing when and how I want. Having a child would prevent a lot of that for several years.  The second reason is that my mom had three hard pregnancies. There is a stillbirth in her past and I almost did not live. I spent the first six months of life on a heart monitor. I do not want to go through that. The third reason is financial. Having a child is expensive. I want to travel. I want to buy a new car. I want to pay off our house. I want to retire early.  All of those things become harder with an extra mouth to feed. That also circles back to reason 1, having a child makes traveling logistically more difficult.

My biggest pet peeve is when people tell me I will change my mind. Or ask me what my husband thinks about it. As if he and I have never had that conversation. A is on board for not having kids. He has 9 nieces and nephews with a 10th on the way. There are plenty of kiddos to dote on when/if we feel the need.  As far as changing my mind, who knows, maybe I will. But I don’t think so. I’m pretty content with being dog and cat mom for little beings that will never talk back and are always down for nap time.


5 thoughts on “My Decision Not to have Kids

  1. Hi Charli,
    I was the one who asked your mom. I love your blog and am impressed with your planning. I was simply curious as I know that child would turn those plans inside out. I wouldn’t trade mine for anything, more would I judge you in any way for not wanting any. I hope my question was not offensive.
    As for your questions, in the blog, I would certainly travel more if money were no issue. But, we are planning and budgeting for a trip to Hawaii next summer for our anniversary. When you have the chance, I recommend Ireland. It’s the most beautiful place I’ve ever been and we will certainly go back. I will probably never retire, but I’m going to enjoy my money while I have it and am young enough to enjoy it 😃


  2. I totally understand and agree. As you know, I had 4 nieces and nephews so I had my kid fix. I haven’t changed my mind about wanting kids and for the same reasons as you.


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